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New Year, New...Me?


Last year, the Miller family rang in the new year as a family of 5. Here are the kids- innocently on the couch, eating their snacks. Shortly after this picture was taken, I remember laying with Sadie in bed watching the ball drop. I watched her sleep, prayed over her and the boys, and dreamt of all the GOOD things that would happen in 2017... was I wrong or what?!

I’ve always heard the saying, “New Year, New Me.” It reminds me of all the times I’ve heard, “you’ll never be the same person…. Once you lose a child, you are never the same.”

To me, this statement always had a negative connotation. Although I knew the context of what they were saying, I took this as a bad thing. I would "never be the same," and I struggled with this because I didn't want to change.

So, in the New Year, does there need to be a “new” me?

No.

I liked the old me, but I’m changed in the way that I see life… this is NOT a bad thing.

2017 has taught me is that I can’t PLAN for what the year will bring, but I can PREPARE. And the only way to prepare for your future is by developing and deepening your relationship with God.

While I was reading, Through the Eyes of a Lion, Levi Lusko states, “you should drink before you’re thirsty and eat before you’re hungry; you never know when you will plunge into pain and careen wildly into crisis.” He continues on the next page saying, “strength is not something that you might need-- there’s no doubt you will need it.”

As we prepare for the good, bad, happy, or sad, you WILL need strength… Even the "good" things in life require us to be strong.

My prayer is that no one even comes close to the pain I’ve endured, but I can say -without a shadow of a doubt- the only way I’m able to survive each day is by my faith and my relationship with our loving Lord.

The New Year is exciting, and I don’t want to be a “downer,” but I’m passionate about people being prepared for this life that is just plain hard.

2018 is the year that Sadie is not in, but as a close friend of mine wrote, it’s just another day. I am one year closer to Sadie... I am one year closer to seeing her sweet face again.

I choose to see this as a year that Trent and I will continue to live a life where you can have HOPE in a broken world.

I choose to continue to walk with Him--every day!

I choose to pray that the Lord uses me and Trent in our heartache.

I pray for each of you, as you read this, you are prepared to take on 2018… no matter what God has in store.

Praying for a successful and GOOD 2018 for all!

Love you, friends.

But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me. -Micah 7:7

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Hope Family Care Ministries provides support, both short-term and long-term to families who have experienced loss of a child.

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